Use your keyboard to make my farewell speech for me.

Put in headphones first. It's really annoying. Controls below.

This temporary website is an incredibly elaborate way to avoid making a farewell speech. If it were up to me, I’d say really nice things—but it isn’t up to me, it’s up to you. Do with me as you please.

To really spice things up hit the number '0' on your keyboard and my speech will be accompanied by Hans Zimmer—it'll probably make it the most epic farewell speech of all time.

Example Speech: 0 / ← / ↑ / 1-9 / 9-3-8-W-G / 4-9-H-S / O / ↑ / ↓ / → / 6-Z / B / 1-9 / ↑

0 - Hans Zimmer

Arrow left - [Clear Throat]
Arrow up - [Laugh]
Arrow right - [Crowd Applause]
Arrow down - [Crowd Laugh]

1 - Thank
2 - I am
3 - Are
4 - I'll miss
5 - Clemenger
6 - I want
7 - It has been
8 - All
9 - You

Q - But
W - Extraordinary
E - For
R - Fucking
T - Fuck
Y - Fucked
U - Everyone
I - To
O - Nah just kidding
P - Good

A - Giles Watson
S - St Kilda Road
D - Friend
F - Clever
G - At your job
H - And
J - Leave
K - Is
L - A

Z - A credit on Graham
X - Vogon
C - Awesome
V - Everything
B - Give it
N - Really
M - Was